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Writer's pictureShelly Chandler

The In-between: Saying, "No."

Updated: Nov 14



This series of devotionals spanned over a three-year period of my life. I wrote out truths that God shared with me throughout every season of this process. I love how he brought this all together, and I pray that you will receive encouragement from what he has allowed me to experience. Praise His Name!

 

I had to say the word "no" the other day, and it was so very hard. I know my voice shook the entire time, and I'd like to say it was from conviction, but honestly, it was out of fear. I was afraid of upsetting the person I said no to and never being asked to do anything again because I'm now one of those people who says "no."

 

When you're living in the in-between, you feel a burden of non-productivity—an emptiness you can't help but feel needs to be filled. To be useful, feel useful, or appear like you are altogether fine, you say "yes" to whatever comes your way. This is one of the biggest enemies of living in the in-between.  

The in-between is about waiting patiently while the Lord does His hidden work - not to run ahead of His plans. You can read the first encouragement from my last blog post, but let's talk about the next step in the in-between.

Let us revisit our passage on the vine and branches.

 

John 15:1-2 "I am the vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful."

 

I mentioned last time that pruning is painful but necessary for optimal fruit bearing. If we want to be fruitful, we must have things cut away. I also mentioned that it takes up to three years of pruning to have the potential for production! Pruning is a practice of patience. Oh, me. So is spiritual growth. This is what we are called to do while living in the in-between. God is at work in the deep places of our lives, which may never see light but are necessary to produce fruit.

 

Let's examine that thought while we read further advice from our author of grapegrowingguide.com about pruning:

"In your first growing season multiple shoots will begin to grow and the vine may become bushy.

Common vineyard practice is to allow at least two to four shoots to emerge. After the leaves have fallen the shoots are then referred to as canes. One or two of these canes will be chosen to establish the vine's base trunk."

 

I love this! Do you see the simplicity? Only a few are chosen, and those are selected to establish the base from which all other production will stem. OH MY! I hope you get this!

 

Has your life taken on a life of its own and, in the process, become "bushy." Any gardener who knows his stuff knows that too many shoots will only sap the vine of its usefulness. I would ask for a raise of hands for those feeling "sapped," but I believe we are all in solidarity here.

 

Let me return to when I said "no." I did not want to. In truth, I said "yes" at first. I did not even hesitate to say "yes." It was such a natural response. It was not until I prayed and sought God that I realized I needed to return and say, "No, I'm sorry. I cannot do that." What I had been asked to do was not hard or wrong. I just wasn't the one that was supposed to do it. God had something else for me.

 

What do you need to say "no" to so you can say "yes" to God? It is simple, but simple doesn't always equate to easy. It is, however, a necessary discipline while in the in-between.

 

This world expects quick fixes and fast results. It is incredibly tempting to say "yes" to everything that crosses our path to prove our validity. The problem with this method is it is derived from our own strength instead of God's. If we are not careful to follow the leadership of God, our quality and quantity will be less desirable. Our Gardener knows what He is doing. I don't believe grapevines are capable of pruning themselves because they don't possess a full-picture mentality. Only the Gardener does.

 

We cannot forget that God defines success completely differently than the world and is doing work that will not make sense to man's mind. God knows what He is about in the life of His child. He knows when to say "no" or "yes." He desires something more for your life.


Listen to what Jesus says in John 15:8

 

"This is to my Father's glory that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples."

 

We cannot take our eyes off the finish line with this because, as disciples of Jesus, bringing God glory is always our objective. The in-between may seem like a strange way to do that, but I'm taking this encouragement to heart!

 

It is funny. No, not really. It is exactly how God operates. Hours after I said "no," I got a message asking me to do something I knew I didn't need to pray about. Why? Because it was what God had already called me to do. It was what He had already determined was one of my yes's. I love that about Him.


"And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6
 

All grape growing quotes from http://www.grapegrowingguide.com/grape-pruning.html

All scripture from NIV, ESV, and NLT translations.

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